And so we returned to the sausagefest that has become X Factor 2012. A pointed recap saw Shaky Maloney’s triumph swiftly edited into a shot of Ella weeping dramatically, aiding the implication that it is Shaky, not Rylan, who is the thief of space intended for talent.
The judges arrived in their usual barf-worthy splendour and Nicole had exchanged her swanxedo for the languid puce of a dead flamingo. Credit where it’s due, Nicole is now the only judge in X Factor history to mentor 3 out of a final 5 acts without a loose clue as to where she even is. As such, she was duty bound to open the show and it was Rylan up first to face the baying crowd.
Jahmene was initially absent from an endearing VT in which Rylan and James gutted a turkey in honour of Nicole’s national holiday (insert fisting joke here). Nicole appeared to make an effort with a pilgrim-style bonnet but I’m choosing to imagine that she’s simply Amish behind closed doors.
The big shock for Rylan was the lack of medley in his opening number. Mamma Mia was surprisingly tuneful for the Ibiza chanteur and the chess set staging was positively Friedmanesque but overall treatment was lukewarm. Louis called Rylan “people’s champion” whilst Gary declared “check mate.” There was no motivation for the public to vote.
Union J’s first VT focused on Jaymi coming out in the press. I found the treatment a little patronising and apologetic but, from a middle England voter perspective, the “We’re still proud of him” spiel couldn’t have been handled better (unless, as we suspect producers would have preferred, the issue had never arisen at all).
Union J’s performance began from plinths. PLINTHS! Do we love them? Do we hate them? Do they unify or divide? Do they distance or celebrate? PLINTHS! And red and black, of course. It looked grim at first.
Then again, The Winner Takes It All was not long ago voted Britain’s favourite ABBA song by ITV viewers and the selection can’t have been without that knowledge. The vocal was solid enough, if set against a badly timed arrangement. Gary had a “good feeling” about the boys and praise was split beyond Jaymi (no surprises considering the demo and the pink week in PR). By the end of the segment it looked like a fair amount of pimping from where we were sat on the Sofabet sofa.
Jahmene (or, as Frankie Boyle has called him, Lewis Hamilton with his head in a vacuum jar) took his mum to the Empowering Wimminz Awards in a shiny new suit and concreted the notion that he is a GOOD AND LOVELY CARING LAD. Performance-wise, he had a gold plinth, a keychange, a cathedral backdrop and plenty of references to dreams and angels. Comments were positive but not overreaching. Vocals were “not on point” but ultimately, Jahmene continued to the receive the benediction of all four judges.
James was up next and his VT focused on Ella’s elimination. James was not portrayed as the act that pushed her out in the singoff but rather her fellow terror victim left with the crippling responsibility of carrying her candle onwards through the Shaky night. We were reminded of James’ ‘roots’ and the fact that he was “not your typical contestant.”
The dubstep beat from James’ Hometown Glory was present, although subtly, in his rendition of S.O.S. The same track was chosen for Ben Mills in 2006 when struggling to find an appropriately ‘credible’ number. James was the only act, discounting the dancey Union J, to perform what Gazza Borelow would call an ‘original interpretation’ on the Abba theme. The lyrics “when you’re gone / how can I even try to go on” nicely echoed the idea that James was ‘doing it for Ella’ and by association for talent and passion and ‘the people’ in general.
Judges were expectedly happy. Louis was surprised to hear that angst and ABBA could work together, which leads me to question whether Louis had a) ever listened to any ABBA lyrics or b) yet been fully assembled in the technologically primitive 1970s. Louis should watch Muriel’s Wedding.
Perfunctory reference to Borelow’s OBE preceded Shaky Maloney’s VT. To Camera, Chris commented, “the public are keeping me in… I’m working the hardest… Ella’s fans should have picked up the phone.” The juxtaposition with James Arthur’s ostensible humility couldn’t have been any starker.
Chris performed in front of a homoerotic writhing of manflesh – surely the best way to alienate the nans and the scousers who are supposedly keeping him in week by week. Lyrically, “if I had to do it all again, I would my friend,” enforced the ‘it’s not my fault I’m still here’ story. Judges slated the staging as “creepy” and all in all the attack felt way too full on. Then again, ITV were never ones to choose subtlety over a backlash.
Speaking of full-on attacks, commenter EM shared the front page of tomorrow’s Mirror in the comments during tonight’s show. It occurs to us that if Chris really is getting a lot of Liverpool votes, it might be smart to drop such a nuclear story in The Mirror and not The Sun – the latter is still not popular on Merseyside.
A slight change in order saw Union J opening the second half of the show. VT focused on the turmoil of having hit the bottom two on two occasions and attempted a phoenix from the ashes sentiment built around the idea that the group had finally gelled and found its true identity. Work ethic was a major focus too.
I’ll Be There, as with week 2’s Bleeding Love, was another echo of Leona Lewis. There was a mild curtain of flame (in XF territory, anything less than Armageddon is mild in pyrotechnic terms). The ‘little girls’ comments from judges may have been a little condescending towards the demo, but, all in all, we felt I’ll Be There constituted a solid boyband moment from Union J.
It’s worth noting that some astute commenters feel very differently about Union J’s treatment tonight. Cath, Sarah and tpfkar were among those who felt the show was out to deramp them – as was our friend Richard Betsfactor, whose thoughts are up on Betsfactor.com.
Next up, Nicole got the wrong camera AND the wrong act but Rylan appeared regardless. After some barrel-scraping product placement in VT form, he appeared on stage in the much-beloved medley. Minajesque clowns in a flurry of Technicolor made it a watchable, if not game-changing set.
Only then (that’s right, Nicole) was it time to reconvene with James Arthur. Let’s Get It On is a big, big song and we were all a tad concerned that the lovechild of Ed Sheeran and Plan B (damn you Borelow for stealing my joke in advance – I’m using it anyway) might not pull it off.
If you had suggested after James’ audition that he would be pulling out Marvin Gaye in week 8, we might have said pffft! But James was shockingly solid on the soul number. There was a bit of a moment on the big falsetto note, but in comparison to some of the flat yelps on high notes by ‘big voices’ like Ella and Jahmene thus far, it was hardly noticeable.
After this standout performance, James is challenging Jahmene for favouritism and is looking like he has a real chance of breaking the hoodoo that nobody in the bottom two has yet won. The suited and booted soul number seemed like a nice ploy to pick up floating votes that Jahmene might otherwise have inherited from Ella. By this point in the evening’s proceedings, Rylan and Maloney were both noticeably shortening in the elimination market with James and Union J doing the same for the win.
Motown should have been Jahmene’s easiest week but as was the case with Rylan in guilty pleasures week, it is often hard for an act to stand out in a week where they are essentially unable to do anything unexpected. Stand out Jahmene did however, on a giant plinth carved into his own name. Astute viewers and those prone to conspiracy theories about associating Jahmene with religion might have noticed the giant ‘AHMEN’ that filled the screen for much of the performance, with cameras cutting off the end letters.
The celestial associations of Jahmene with halos, angels and heaven throughout the weeks might have done well to suggest that he is pure and wholesome (and above us mere mortals) but it wouldn’t take too much for programme-makers to push the theme over the edge and leave us with a Marcus Collins-style crucifixion image. My personal feeling at this stage is that producers would like to keep Jahmene steady, avoid a backlash-risking deramp and pip him at the post with whom I assume is their favoured winner, James. It looks quite possible, but then again this has been a bizarre year.
Chris, who has admitted before that he can’t really dance, was forced to close the show with a song about dancing. Dancing On The Ceiling is a karaoke classic but hardly a quintessential Motown number. I think they did it just to confuse viewers with that upside-down camera shot which was shown again in the reprise.
Still, it fitted well with the cruiser’s 80s repertoire, albeit far too up-tempo for his sharp, vibrato vocals. Commenter Nicky made an interesting point re the Abba round – Chris was put on last with a not-so-well-loved number after some real classics. The same happened with the Motown songs. Judges comments were damning as ever with references to Benidorm and karaoke aplenty. Again, it felt a little like overkill to us.
And so we are exactly where we thought we were last week. If producers have gauged it right then the much-loathed Shaky’s time is up and he’ll be sent packing. If they’ve overcooked their treatment of him again, the tepidly-treated Rylan is backup evictee and I’m moving to Canada. Our sense of Union J’s treatment tonight is that producers are hoping to rebuild some excitement about them in the hopes of completing an all-J final, and hoping to avoid a third bottom 2 appearance.
At time of writing, Rylan is favourite to go, shortly followed by Chris. Our feeling is that producers will attempt to cut Chris loose in any sing-off, and it wouldn’t be against the grain for both Tulisa and Louis to side with Rylan should the latter be bottom of the public vote.
Agree? Disagree? We don’t mind, we just want you to FEEL! Let us know how you do, as ever, below.
http://www.dailystar.co.uk/xfactor/view/284354/Simon-Cowell-plans-to-dump-Christopher-Maloney-even-if-he-wins/
“Christopher even extended his lead over closest rival Jahmene, 21, last weekend and is on track to pull off a landslide win at next month’s final”
Uh oh.
And here’s the full Mirror story:
http://www.mirror.co.uk/3am/celebrity-news/x-factor-star-chris-maloney-1455646
Andrew, read the comments at the bottom of that article. Not a single person believes it, if anything, it’s strengthening the resolve of the Maloney supporters.
Right, that’s it, I’m getting on the Maloney bandwagon. If these stories are true, Maloney’s treatment of the producers smacks of desperation as they try something – anything – to get him off the top of the pile. This has me convinced that Rylan and Union J will leave before the final leaving James in 3rd, Jahmene in 2nd and Chris as the winner.
So you seriously think that Maloney will get more than 50% of the vote in the final? I just don’t see it. He may well have won every vote right now, but I think no way is he going to pick up the floating voters that he’d need to win.
Had a tickle on Chris at 20s a few weeks ago but am worried the bet is lost now. Read a couple of these newspaper splash and slash stories re Chris and fail to see how the stories help him.
Then there is the possibility that more stories are on the way. We’ve all seen how one media revelation leads to another.
If so, in a blink, he’s finished.
If not, and very quickly proved not, he wins – unless he quits before the wronging has been righted.
He might quit out of concern for the effect on his nan of all this horrific publicity.
If he goes, by one means or another, then am interested in where the vote transfer flows.
Does the Chris-who-loves-his-nan vote naturally deposit itself in the Jahmene-who-loves-his-mum bank?
If the latest (trusted) Daily Star leak is correct then it is likely that the top two in the voting all series long have been Chris and Jahmene (in that order).
The very-close-relationship-with-a-female-family-member voting block is thus gargantuan in this contest.
I think last night’s show probably proved Jscouser2002’s long-held assertion that James has always been the (credible) chosen one, but the isn’t-he-a-lovely-lad emotion seems to translate into dominant phone vote stats.
How should this morning’s newspaper stories influence betting behaviour?
Sorry that should read: “Maloney’s treatment the hands of producers”
Dug – great write up and everything sounds plausible. But that Star link is essential reading. Top of the vote after Sun God eyes? Hard to see him anywhere the bottom 2 this week if true, why on earth don’t they force him to do a modern dance track and have the judges saying how surprised they are how good it was?
I’m guessing Gary’s gone rogue and is refusing to choose modern songs.
Gone rogue – I love that phrase, Sarah, but if that’s true, I’d be amazed. I really thought Barlow would have more integrity than that.
If Chris is still in next week then I hope Gary insists on a song choice of Billy Joel’s An Innocent Man. Would be a fascinating watch and laugh to watch how the production design undermined that message.
If he makes it to the final, I predict they will team him with Freddy Krueger for the duet.
Or Rihanna.
Christopher will probably get lumbered with Robbie or Michael Buble if he makes it to the final. They tend to be the ‘meh’ ones that the runners-up get.
Thank you all – I am enormously reassured that my thinking on Chris still being here next week and the week after is shared with others. I thought with the first dance number and the writhing flesh mountain even though obvious was still so offputting it might have weakened resolve
When I saw they’d chosen Dancing On The Ceiling, and Chris had actually got to move and shake his thang for this one, I was half-expecting Peter Crouch on rollerskates. However, he actually surprized me and made a good job of it.
Hurrah, for the underdog!
I think Chris will be safe again this week. Again Louis and Tulisa’s criticism went too far (especially the sniggering) and I think it helped that Gary said he felt uncomfortable with some of the comments. In fact, I’d go as far as to say that Tulisa seems to inadvertedly sabotage the attempts to deramp Chris by getting too personal. I think the problem with the producers using the dodgy staging against Chris is that after last week the public are now aware it’s not down to him and Gary.
My bet on the bottom 2 is Rylan and Union J. There was nothing really to motivate Rylan’s fans to vote last night and both performances were quite tepid by his standards. I also felt the song choices could have been better if they really wanted him to stick around. Union J were okay and the comments seemed to reflect that. I think their main problem is there is still nothing very anonymous about them. I feel the show’s big chance to promote them was the Best of British week and they failed to do that. I can’t see Rylan being saved over Union J.
I was slightly surprised that the average ratings last night were only about 8.0 million with Strictly about 2 million ahead. The Ella controversy was clearly not the ratings booster they were hoping for.
Chris will win this, it looks obvious now. The only other over whos won XF is Steve Brookstein so its easy to say Cowell will get rid of Chris even before xmas
Its hard to see Chris winning this with more than 50% of the votes, however given his “story” it wouldn’t be a major surprise at him in the final, hence how he is odds on to make the final.
He wouldn’t be deemed a good winner for the producers, if he does make the final. Which would be great for the press and ratings, I have no doubt that the treatment the producers give him will ruin his chances, baring in mind lots of viewers of the final dont really watch the rest of the series regularly.
Just give him 2 uptempo numbers with a bit of dancing bad stage lighting and it would be enough to prevent him from winning in the final.
You do have a point. But with all the negativity going on around XF this year and most people criticising it (the people who’ve bothered to watch that is), I think theres gonna be a massive anti XF vote this year with people getting revenge on the producers for (“according to them”) getting rid of talented acts like Jade, Carolynne an Ella. Thats why, imo, theres a chance Chris could win it.
Id rather James, the most talented person this year in my eyes, win it though!
I was undecided whether the Maloney fiasco smacked of panic and desperation or smug confidence in having finally slain the beast they’ve accidentally created. (They’ve only got themselves to blame, oh no, it’s the public’s fault for VOTING FOR THE WRONG PEOPLE). Honestly, how dare people vote for someone who was allowed/invited to enter a competition the same way as all the other contestants and then had the temerity to do rather well. I’m looking forward to the Syco lottery when they start one. Apparently, you buy a ticket the same as everyone else, but if you’re too old, too ugly, not cool enough or something, you’re not allowed to win as it’s clearly cheating.
I’m in the Chris is safe, Syco panicking camp having seen this morning’s tabloid stories. I not sure the Cruise Ship Strangler angle is going to be anymore effective than the previous mud that hasn’t stuck. If Shakey really is such an arse, why don’t they just confront him with it on the show? They had no reservations doing this with Misha last year.
I ask family and friends who they like, just to see how other people think. My Mum, aunties etc all love Maloney. I mean REALLY love him! If he was on in the West End, they’d be booking the coach trip immediately. And from what I can tell from this extensive market research, last night’s performances definitely delighted his demo.
For me, its exactly the same as last week. We didn’t really learn much we didn’t already know.
It was much a case of aim for Chris. But again I thought it was fairly obvious and it made him look more like a victim after the judges comments as opposed to the villain he was in his VT.
I thought Gary saying “I’m getting a bit uncomfortable with comments we are getting here and all week too” He may as well have said “I am not comfortable with the bullying I am watching that’s being aimed at Chris” if this was picked up it will gain him some votes, however not sure it was noticed enough by the average viewer.
I see no reason to think that Chris will land in the bottom two compared to other weeks. Although like most, i agree, if he does end up in the bottom two, he is gone against any act.
There was something Flat about Rylans performances I think it lacked the “fun” that is normally used to motivate Rylans fans to vote. It also lacked much banter during the judges comments, the same banter I think kept him in last week. Dermot didn’t interview him either after his second performance, I think that was a deliberate attempt to stop Rylans natural and clever off-script banter coming through. In order to make sure he is in the drop as a backup to Chris.
Other than that I didn’t see anything that suggests James cant bounce, if anything I thought his performance of “lets get it on” was outstanding, as most know I am very “pro-James” but I was not expected him to hit that note, and i was shocked by the effect the wow moment had. For me it was very impressive.
Jahmene on the other hand, what a strange production for his second performance. I just don’t like Jahmene and thought it was his worst week totally, if James can fall in the bottom two last week, there is no reason the same cant happen for Jahmene this week. The only positive about his week was his VT about doing it for his mum. What makes me wonder.. its week 8, why do these acts still need a sob story. Suggests he aint high enough in the votes.
I really don’t have much to say about Union J, but still think the extra votes they picked up from D3 as well as two good performances. all be it with some bizarre stage lighting. I’m not a big UJ fan, but personally I think 2nd spot is were they will finish. Behind James with Jahmene finishing 3rd.
I have backed Rylan to go this week at 11-10 and evens, purely based on the fact I don’t see any difference in Chris from last week, yet there was a lot less “Fun” in Rylans performances and judges comments and he needs that to survive. With a small saver on Jahmene to be in the bottom 2 at 9-2.
Sorry meant to put this too.
I dont think there is any draw bias in the final few weeks, well certainly not as significant as the first few weeks when their are more acts and some are “forgotten”
However I thought the worst slot for Rylan to be on is first (despite them singing twice), Purely because for that type of act Rylan is a “fun” act someone who LIFTS the mood, thats the mood that often encourages fans to vote.
This works to good effect if on after a low tempo song or in the middle of the show after a few of them. However being on 1st it doesn’t really offer the viewers the chance to need/want/appreciate that “fun” effect and notice it.
Its also worth noting the last time Rylan was on 1st, was the last time he was in the bottom two. This was with the added regional vote with “essex” mentioned 20 times in 15 seconds.
So u think Chris wont make the final? Good luck!
Assuming Rylan goes this week, it will be interesting to see the prices for next elimination, and how chris is priced up in this market.
I expect him to be favourite. Who would you expect to go at the expense of Chris?
Just following leaks Chriss been topping the votes for 7 weeks and the fact UnionJ look very damaged atm, as well as hints (song choices and comments mainly) hinting producers arent 100% behind them
Most of my thoughts have been echoed by various people already, but the one thing I haven’t noticed is the choice of Let’s Get It On for James. The judges were emphasising how the girls would love it, but this isn’t his demographic? They’re going for the “tv credible” angle (Ed Sheeran, Plan B), and those people would rather see him doing a slightly edgy version of a classic (e.g. Hometown Glory) with his guitar rather than caring about his voice alone, which is what the judges made a big deal of afterwards when not saying how all the women would love it.
I can’t see James picking up votes from any of the other artists as the show goes on, aside from perhaps Union J (although I think those fans are more likely to just stop voting if they go) so for me he’s a definite swerve in the outright market.
I don’t think that there’s anything this week that would’ve made his fans, who I expect care less about X Factor than most other artists’ fans anyway, pick up the phones and cause as big a bounce as most people are expecting either. For me, he’s very much in danger of a bottom two (I’ve backed in combinations with Union J pre-show and Rylan post-show), at least more likely than the markets think. He’d bounce from there to the final though, as after last week, I don’t think the judges can (or would want to) kill him against anybody.
We will see later but James is safe me thinks.
Re James, I think last week’s attempt to broaden his appeal didn’t work and probably depleted his normal vote. But the song was quite boring, not really a guilty pleasure song, just one that most people neither really like nor hate. I think his song choices this week were much better, especially the Motown number, and his natural supporters would have enjoyed them. I’m still not sure if he’ll pick up many floaters/older fans though, as I don’t think he ‘s their cup of tea.
I feel that James is safe too having smashed the ball out of the park especially with his second song this week. However, I don’t feel that Jahmene is too safe and to me the whole giant name thing was an BIG unsubtle beg (and a prayer complete with an ‘ahmen’, as Dug said), for votes to keep him safe. He was also singing from behind a ‘V’, which could stand for Vote and/or Victory.
With all the crazy stuff going on with what happened to Ella last week, I am therefore doing a couple of small crafty b2’s involving Jahmene with Chris and Rylan, as both need a credible ‘no contest’ opponent in a sing-off to hammer the last nail into their performance coffins (hopefully Baloney’s).
I had an interesting afternoon….At the olds for Sunday lunch, and then in fron of the box for an hour or so. Now the wife suggested I get an outsiders view of the acts, as my olds (lets call them Norman and Norma from Norfolk) are about as Shaky demographic as you get. Pensioners, mum loves Cliff Richard, dad loves anything pre status quo.
We put it on part of the way through James Arthur’s 1st song. Dads reaction… ‘he can’t sing, thats a load of screeching. Rubbish.’… Jahmmene was on, their reaction was ‘ I wish he wouldn’t do all that wabbling around with his voice, its cos he can’t hold a note’…Rylan… ‘christ he’s terrible.’
Union J… ‘not as good as one direction’. Funny, because they are far stronger singers in my opinion. Then Shaky gives it some Fernando, my old man says ‘Thats much more like it. I like this one, he’s a proper singer, singing a nice song.’ Mum agreed, ‘yeah he looks nice.’ I told them that he gets the full treatment to be got rid of, I stopped short of explaining camera angles and red n black, but their reaction was ‘Why are they being horrible to him, he looks really nice and normal.’
Moral of the story, if I was one of TPTB, I would stop the negative comments, its lost on his vote, they can’t hear it mainly, they just watch the singing. They will only get him in my opinion by giving him a song that he either a)struggles to give his full on belt out the big notes voice to, or b) give him something that he can’t connect to the voters with, too modern or too sexy. I think he demo see him as a nice guy, and that was only enhanced last night in my view….
I think he is safe this week as a result. I can’t see past a Union J and Rylan bottom 2, thats if there is a bottom 2?
I don’t plan to get involved though financially until we have a bottom two though, as I am not comfortable commiting until then, and its a guessing game at this stage, and as we saw in week 1 with Carolynn at big odds during the sing off on betfair, and last week with Ella very backable, thats where the profit is for me. Good Luck tonight folks
Think your olds must be related to mine 🙂
ChrisR….can you ask them for me… “Did you vote?”
😀
ChrisR. Very affectionately (as my ‘olds’ aren’t here any more so you treasure these golden oldy views moments), but do they actually pick up the phone to vote though?
My theory is that its the daft kids that do (and in multiples for their heart-throbs), which is why I am on Union J and James. This is what I base my bets on. It worked well last year.
BTW, I remember my Mam marching into the living room and switching off (at the plug) a record that I borrowed and was playing when I was 15 because of the suggestive lyrics. That record was ‘Lets spend the night together..The Stones’. I had to hide my Black Sabbath LP and only play it when they were out, otherwise it would have ended up on the coal fire, lol.
No they didn’t, but that is mainly because they don’t watch x factor too often, but I would imagine there are many who think the way they do, who do pick up the phone.
I hope so mate, on Rylan for the chop tonight myself.
Think Chris looks like a Victim more like a Villian. hoping that’s transparent to the majority at home.
Placed some on Rylan to leave, if he doesnt leave this week, he wins imo
Another Leona Lewis special for Union J! When do coincidences become a pattern? Not that I have any idea why they are doing it!
I do treasure them I assure you. I know how lucky I am. LPs eh… kids don’t know what they are missing these days
UnionJ must have polled less than Rylan. I dont think they’ll overcome James in the votes next week even with sympathy votes
I think Rylan was bottom myself. The stats don’t look good for UJ next week though. I’ve just been looking at the previous results. I’m sure you all this know this, but I thought I’d point it out anyway:
every act that survived the bottom two at the five act stage has been eliminated the following week, ie, finished fourth. (Diana Vickers, Danyl Johnson, Cher Lloyd and Misha B).
Union J’s only chance would be if the percentages were very close at the bottom end of the pile yesterday, allowing them to claw their way into third place next week. Also, the act that came third in the vote at the five act stage has never gone on to win,(Eoghan Quigg, Olly Murs, One Direction and Marcus Collins).
If the above is a significant stat, James needed to come first or second this week to stand a chance of winning. If the Star is correct and Christopher and Jahmene have been the front runners, James would have needed to increase his appeal considerably to overturn the order. I’m not convinced he managed to do this. But ‘Let’s Get It On’ was good though……